using “pain as a platform.”

I finished watching the Netflix series Dear White People tonight (which was really good, but I will warn those who haven’t watched it but might be interested in it that there are a ton of sex/sexual scenes, so just be aware).

Also, I’m probably going to give away some things in this post, so if you haven’t watched it, but would like to, maybe save reading this after watching at least the sixth episode!

Anyways, in the sixth episode, one of the characters Reggie Green says a beautiful spoken word poem about his feelings and thoughts after having a gun pointed at him by campus police during a small scuffle at a party. Not only was I inspired by his piece, but I was also inspired by what he said to his friend Sam after she suggested that he share it with everyone to make a point for the black community on campus.

He said to her: “My pain is not your platform.”

I thought it was so interesting, and really powerful, and I even felt that this was his thought before he even spoke these words. As I watched the scene play out, I thought about whether I had ever felt the same way Reggie felt in regards to my own writing, and have realized that as time has progressed, I haven’t utilized that filter as much. I used to filter basically everything I wrote, and only posted or shared the things I thought were extremely good; none of the messy, raw feelings I truly felt.

But as I’ve begun and continued #JustStartWriting, I’ve realized that this filter has been tossed to the side a little. Almost everything I write for myself, I post on my blog, and while I don’t think there is anything wrong with that, I now feel that there are some things that just need to be for my eyes, my heart, my soul only.

There have been poems, monologues, entries I have written to help me process through different things during my life, and more recently, I have had the pressure to release them to the public because hey, who knows if there’s someone out there who needs to read what I wrote, and feel comforted knowing that there was somebody else out there who felt the same way?

However, I’m learning that there are things I can’t share with everyone; the words I put together to help me get through a tough time may not need to be seen or read by the eyes of the world. And no writer or any other creative should feel pressured by anyone, including themselves, to take something they’ve created for their personal healing or processing, and share it with the world just to make a statement, or to get people to read their writing or see their craft, etc.

As I am continuing to work on updating my website, creating a new website, and getting everything together for the official drop date (which will be announced soon along with some other fun surprises!), I’ve had to really take these thoughts into consideration. Even though I truly love when I can connect with people’s emotions and experiences through my own, I never want to compromise my privacy or healing in the process.

Does this mean I won’t be posting any intimate writing here anymore? Of course that’s not what this means. It just means I need to evaluate my writing better than I have been. Would I love to share everything with you all? Of course, but as I said, some things are simply meant for me.

When words said,
Written,
Strung together as with needle and thread
Are for you and your healing…
You and your process…
Don’t feel the need to share it with everyone
Just so people can like it or
Just to prove a point.
If your words are for you then
Keep them as such.

#JustStartWriting

πŸ’™ Mishy πŸ¦‹

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